textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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