Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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