No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
