sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
