I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Randomize
