she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize