This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
