So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
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