You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
You were trust falling into bushes
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
