Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
