he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize