True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Is it penis luge time yet?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!