If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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