You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him