can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.