What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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