he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize