Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize