do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize