fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
