i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
But we have bathrooms and they dont
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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