Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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