D3 body, D1 cock
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I wish you could order shots online.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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