Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
