Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
