8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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