STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
