So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
