It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
