We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
