New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
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