Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
