too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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