OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Randomize