Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
