how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
