I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
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