he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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