so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize