i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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