party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
