Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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