She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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