on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
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He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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