i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
