We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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