fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
