your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize