how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
