Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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