so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
nutella sex= disaster
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
