Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
