16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
